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Nov 1 - It's November!!!! We are just under 60 days to go! We found out that we all will be home for Christmas! This piece of news is definitely putting all of the guys in a good mood. It is so evident that everyone is so ready to go home. I feel like I have given Iraq my best and I can't give any more! As I've stated before this country has such a long way to go before it is stablized. I am still bothered by how the Iraqis have taken up such a comfortable posture with us. Today is the last day of training with them. Before we load every one on the trucks and head back in we ask the Iraqis to do what we call in the Army a 'police call'. That is where every person will spread out at arms length away from each other and then walk the training area picking up trash as they go. If everyone cooperates this simple task will only take 5 minutes to succussfully execute. Well today I learned another thing about the Iraqi culture. This culture supposively is based on respect. What I am finding is that the respect that they give is conditional. When the Iraqis don't want to do something they use a term called 'Inshalla'. Translated it means "God willing'. It is easier to use this term than rather to tell a man 'no'. Trust me, they use this term just like candy! Well today my team and I didn't even get a 'Inshalla'. We asked the Iraqi officers to order their men to pick up the trash in the training area before we leave. It is funny how body language can almost be a universal form of communication. I saw just then a handful of guys get up and do what we ask of them. The others were a site to behold. Some sat back against the walls of the building that was near us and acted as if they didn't hear us! They were small groups of three to four guys who were pretending to be engaged in a conversation and they totally ignored us! Well we had a our first international crisis on our hands! I Some of the Iraqi officers just stood around looking at us as we attempted through interpreters to communicate that we wanted this task done. Iraqis can be very passive aggressive when they don't want to do something. I was growing more and more angry as I watched this display of disrespect that was being directed at us! It was then that my drill sergeant personna kicked in and I grabbed an interpreter and ran to the middle of the area and shouted "hey no one will be allowed to leave or go to lunch until this area is picked up! The choice is yours! We can stay here all day if you like!" Just like little kids who have decided to make the right choice and give up their tantrum they one by one gave up their protest and began to start picking up trash! I would soon be told by one of our interpreters that the Iraqis would say "Sgt. Lewis is a good guy. He dances with us but he changed into a mean guy!" I explained to my interpreter that if he were to go to any American military installation you would not find trash thrown all over the place. I consider myself to be a good judge of human behavior but what I saw today really distrubed me. How does one justify that kind of behavior? It's like trying to get a teenager to clean his or her room when it is messy!

Nov 2 – We arrived back at our camp safe and sound. I couldn’t be happier to see my room again. My room is my fortress of solitude. It’s the place where I can close the door behind me and forget about this war. Many of you know that I am a very social person, but after a day of listening to people gripe and complain about being here it is always a pleasure to return to my place of peace. It’s ironic that I call my room that because we were awakened this morning by incoming rockets that came into our camp. It sounded like four of them exploded somewhere nearby. The insurgents must have gotten the word that we were back in town! As I described before it is something that those of us that live here grow accustomed to hearing. Outside our rooms they have built mini bomb shelters for us but everyone will continue to do what they were doing. Some people will even sleep through the rocket attack!

Nov 3 – Well I just got orders that I have been promoted to Master Sergeant! This of course means that I will be going to another unit. I will have to give up my drill sergeant hat and come off, what we call the ‘the trail’. I have had seven good years as a drill sergeant. I will miss it with all of my heart. I love motivating people. This was the perfect platform to do this. Over the years I have trained thousands of soldiers. I even ran into one over here that remembered me when she first came to Fort Jackson. She said that she was so scared when she got there but when she met me she knew that she was going to be alright. I forgot to ask her if that was a positive or negative statement! There will be so much that I will miss. I will miss the early morning sounds of thousands of soldiers doing PT (physical training) in the morning. I will miss the enjoyment of marching troops and the sound of the boots hitting the ground as we sing cadence. I will also miss the game of ‘cat and mouse’ that is played between trainee and instructor as we try to instill into them military values and discipline that will take a common person and turn them into a world class professional soldier that the world has ever known. I will miss being looked at as the ‘standard barer’. Because in the drill sergeant world you are the first impression of the Army that these people will see and for the most part a lasting impression at that. If you go to anyone who has been in the military at all they all can still tell you the name of their drill sergeants. These were the men and women who challenged you. They would look at your potential and would never accept anything less than your best each day! For some people these expectations changed their lives forever! For some it was more encouragement than they got from home. I know because I was there when soldiers would openly cry whenever they completed something they thought they couldn’t do. I was there at many a graduation ceremony where a father with tears in his eyes would just stare at his son because he couldn’t believe how much this young man has changed. This kid who used to sit on the couch playing Nintendo is now shaking his hand as man with a purpose in his life. I too would have tears well up in my eyes as I saw soldier after soldier move on to pursue their own careers. I have to come to another reality and that is I am getting older. The recruits aren’t getting any older. For a 47 year old man I am in good shape but it gets harder each year. I finished my last cycle of basic training last year with my three girlfriends, Advil, Tylenol and Motrin. To me becoming a drill sergeant is my greatest achievement. This time I will be standing on the sidelines now cheering the new recruits on. My new position will take me back to my roots which are logistics. I will embrace this new endeavor with the same enthusiasm. Trust me, drill sergeants never die they just exhale!

Nov 4 – The reports are that Baghdad is becoming safer. There haven’t been a lot of attacks on Coalition forces in the region quite some time now. I learned from one of our intelligence guys that there is a new strategy going on. The insurgents are now attacking Iraqi security forces directly. By doing this they will win influence and control in the area. Another result is now they don’t have to directly fight American forces that are in the area. It makes perfect sense, if you control the police and military forces in the area then you control the area without firing a shot at Coalition forces! I want to paint a picture for you here of what these people deal with on a daily basis. I am outside my house watering my flower bed. A strange man will come up to me and say that if I don’t support the insurgent group in the area he will kill me and my whole family. He tells me that it will do no good to go to the police because their group is supported by the local police. He also states that if I go to the Iraqi military I will find the same results there. I am faced with a dilemma. I could go to the Americans and tell them about this encounter but if I do I have no guarantee that me and my family will be protected should there by a reprisal. In my neighborhood I am cautious who I share my options with because I don’t know if my neighbors are watching every move that I make. I have a wife and three kids and I am concerned about their safety. The decision is clear; I will have no choice but to conform to the corruption in the area just to ensure my family’s safety. That is how these people survive over here. I call it ‘the country of alliances’. It depends on what side you are standing on when something goes down.

Nov 6 – I am just under 45 days until I go home. There are several larger units here in our camp that is preparing to go home as well. You can tell the ones that are going home. They are the soldiers that have a little more pep in their step. There are other signs as well. The post office has a long line of soldiers shipping their entire personal items home. Since I’ve returned there are so many new faces in the mess hall. The new units are here to replace the units that are leaving. The lines in the mess hall are equally as long. For some of us that have been here almost a year there is a sense that we are old veterans now. Our faces are tanned and weathered as compared to the fresh faces of all the new people that are coming in. We once looked like that too. We had that untarnished look of innocence mixed with the excitement of the unknown rushing through our veins. It’s obvious that is time to go home. When I got back from our 30 day training I had 8 care packages on my desk! I want to thank you all for your support of me over this year. It was nice to have a box with my name on it when I would come in after a hard day in the sun. Your outpouring of support has truly helped me get through this whole year. I say ‘thank you’; so if you know of any soldiers over here please continue to support them. If you don’t know any you can contact your local USO or join the ‘Adopt a soldier program’ on the internet. I still have a little more time over here and yes I have to be careful to keep my guard up because it is still dangerous over here. I will be careful and keep you posted.

Nov 7 – There has been an increase of rocket attacks on our camp! I don’t have a television in my room so I don’t know what the news wires are saying. I guess it doesn’t matter because the truth is if it happens here I would know firsthand before it hit the mainstream news media. What’s strange about these attacks is that it’s about 4 p.m. and usually we get this in the mornings. I can feel the impact shake my trailer. I get up from my desk and go outside to have a look. I can see a small black mushroom cloud in the distance. The stream of black smoke can be seen about a mile away but the impact feels like it landed just outside my door! I have just about 32 days to go and this is one thing that I will not miss! As I’ve stated before the mentality here is to continue on what you were doing before the rocket hit the camp. It does no good to run out in a panic to the shelter. Those that do that we can tell that they must have just gotten here. It will be soon in no time that they too will grow accustomed to the impact of the rockets. What an insane way to cope with such a situation. I have a team meeting in about 10 minutes and I have to walk across my living area and cross a street on to another living area to get to my team room. As I am walking it does cross my mind the possibility of a rocket directly hitting me. Well, this is where my faith comes in. I trust God for my safety as I boldly make my way to my team room.

Nov 9 – To my surprise the officer that I work with, he and I were awarded the Army Commendation Medal for Valor. I will read to you what the award says:

The Army Commendation Medal with Valor
Sergeant First Class Roy H. Lewis

For valorous achievement wile serving as a National Police Transition team member. On 11 March 2007, SFC Lewis charged through withering small arms fire, successfully leading the National Police in an assault on an enemy position. His dedication to mission success and exceptional leadership are in keeping with the finest traditions of military service and reflect great credit upon him, task force Thunderhorse, the Dager Brigade, and the United States Army.

Given under my hand in the city of Washington,

Col J.B. Burton

This award was for what I believe the time that I and another officer were shot at while on a walking patrol in a neighborhood. Hey folks all that military verbage sounds good but I am not going to lie. This brother was scared!! It is true what they say when your in a dangerous situation. When it happened I thought about my wife. I had thoughts of never seeing my children again. Even though this little skirmish might have lasted only a few minutes it felt like hours! I remembered the captain called my name and told me to prepare to move out from our position. I remembered how dry my mouth became as I just acknowledged him by just nodding. It was then that I heard the sweetest sound. That was my friend who was positioned on the 50 cal machine gun letting his presence be known by letting a few rounds go downtown! I remembered the sense of relief when I heard that very loud but very effective gun do its thing. I don’t know about all that valor stuff. Remember I believe that heroes aren’t people; they are my favor deli sandwich!

Nov 12 – There hasn’t been much going on in the past few days since returning from the training facility. My time has been spent running around doing things such as inventories, mailing my personal items home, and buying supplies for our team room. We are down to seven guys left on our team. We had one that was transferred because of his conduct and the other three were assigned because they refused to work our team chief. This is the guy that I have written about in the past few months. As we draw close to the end of this mission it is evident to me after talking to other teams that the individuals that end up being moved around from team to team are always not the best people. In other words teams will not give up their best people. So what usually happens is that other teams will pick up another team’s problems. This is the case for my team. This has happened to us not only once but twice! What we have here is an inexperienced officer that is so bad at leading that the decisions he makes sometimes can become life threatening not only to him but also to the welfare of our team! When confronted he becomes defensive whenever anyone offers a suggestion or option that is different than his. Because of this my team has totally shut down mentally and now everyone has become unmotivated and isolated. What is embarrassing to me is that our chief has gotten a bad reputation with the higher command that supports us. He has also managed to pull this off with the Iraqis as well. There was one evening at the training facility that the Iraqi National Police command hosted a dinner in which all of the training teams were invited. There was a table set up for our team to sit with our Iraqi officers. When everyone took their seats they managed to have our chief sit way down at the other end of the table in between two young Iraqi officers! The atmosphere among the guys is that we are just under 30 days until we go home. The damage is done and let the pieces fall where they may. For me, it has been a good year living here in Iraq. I’ve experienced many things that I will probably never get the chance to do again. There is also a piece of me that feels that I have done everything that I know to do. I have given my best and now it’s time for me to return home to my family. I am grateful for my time that I have spent here in Iraq being an American soldier. I have no regrets. My team has been through a lot; the internal problems just only add to the drama.

Nov 13 – There has been talk that we are going on a mission with our National Police to occupy a new sector. I heard that this sector is very dangerous and now that our battalion has just completed training they will be pushed into this new sector. My team’s response to this new is a surprise because we have just about four weeks until we turn our equipment over to the next team and fly back home. I’m equally disappointed because for the last three months I have watched units prepare themselves for their trip back to the states. The last two to three weeks are filled with excitement as the lines at the post office are long with soldiers shipping their entire personal belongings home. You can tell the ones that are going home. You can hear it in their voices as they talk to one another in the mess hall. Who would have known that my last three weeks in Iraq would be spent on patrol in a new sector! To make matter worse, this new sector is a dangerous one according our intelligence resources. I am really angry and I don’t know who to get mad at. I know these decisions are made echelons above me. I just wish that they would have some kind of consideration towards us and let us enjoy preparing to go home. It is unanimous amongst the team that we are all tired and are ready to go home. We have been together as a team since September of 2006! We do have a sense of humor around here. The guys made up a holiday for us. It’s called ‘Man Love Thursday’. This is the day of the week were we guys let down our hard exteriors and express love to each other by giving each other a hug. Well today we are going to need it!

Nov 14 – The orders have gone out that we are definitely leaving for this new sector today. We were told that it would be 12 midnight last night but that window has come and gone. We were also given a departure time of 2 p.m. this afternoon as well. The indecision I’m told comes down from the Iraqi Ministry of Interior (MOI) and the Ministry of Defense (MOD). These two governmental departments argue back and forth on Iraq’s internal issues such as this one determining where to position our National Police battalion. While writing this, an order has come down and we are now moving out at 6 o’clock. We will meet up with up with our Iraqi battalion in our new sector. The sun is starting to set around 5 p.m. and all the training teams including mine are now in a convoy formation ready to head out the gate. I really nervous not because we are traveling at night but the vehicle that I will be riding in is the last vehicle and I am the rear gunner. I will be responsible for the rear security of the convoy. We head out the gate after we are briefed by our colonel. In just a matter of minutes the lights of Baghdad grow dimmer and fade into the night. The estimated time for this trip is four hours. This will do a number on my butt because I ride on a bench seat that holds me up in the turret of the truck. The cool weather has made its way into the area because after an hour I am getting cold. It’s not that bad because I ride backwards so that I can see the road behind the convoy. The cold wind is blowing behind me but I am protected by a fiberglass shield. As we travel through each little town there are no highway lights. It is easy to see what residents are fortunate to own a generator to supply their electrical needs. For the most part we were traveling through areas that were totally dark. After about three hours we stopped at a refueling outpost. We took a short break and we were off again with us being about 1 hour from destination. It was about 11:30 p.m. when we saw the lights of the city that we were to occupy with our police battalion. We made our way through the outskirts of the city where a long road lead us through a series of security checkpoints. We made it! We didn’t get attacked along the way. I was relieved to finally have seen some signs of life in the area. Our convoy was cleared to enter the camp and we made our way to the parking area where they had some barracks assigned to us. Everyone was tired and ready to get some sleep. The trucks were off loaded and every one grabbed a bunk for a good nights sleep. When I hit the mattress I took a moment to thank God for watching over us as we traveled. The roads are very dangerous to travel and riding for 4 hours with my senses on red alert has taken its toll on me. I was exhausted.

Nov 15 – We awaken to find the camp alive with military personnel from at least 10 countries! I went to the mess hall for breakfast and saw soldiers from Poland, Bosnia, Romania, British, Uganda, Armenia, and Mangolia! This is amazing so many nations work here. I feel like I am at the Olympics. The only thing that is funny is that everyone is afraid to talk to each other because of the language barrier. The common language is English so everyone here does speak a little of it. I am sitting in the mess hall in this camp and across from me is 4 Asian soldiers eating breakfast and sharing a joke between them. At another table is a group from Poland speaking in their native tongue eating eggs and bacon. Waiting in line mixed with the American soldiers are British, Iraqi, and Romania soldiers waiting to place their order for their omelets. I take a moment to reflect on how there is so many people throughout the world. It is a shame that we all don’t know each other. I wanted to bust out into that old Michael Jackson song ‘We are the World’ and hold hands with everyone in the mess hall. No doubt my intentions, even though they were admirable would have been met with strange stares from these soldiers. That’s me; I would like life to be like a musical!

Nov 16 – To my surprise we got the order to leave this camp today. We have traveled about 175 miles to get here to find out that the Iraqi Army did even know that our National Police were coming. This unexpectant arrival has prompted many problems when we got here. For starters there were no accommodations available for these guys to live. The battalion that I work with was housed at a local veterinarian college outside the city. The place looked more like the state fair grounds where they judge the livestock. It smelled like it did too. There was this barn like looking building that would house our soldiers. They had a few bunk beds inside the building but there are not enough for everyone. This didn’t sit too well with the Iraqi National Police guys. Whenever the Iraqis would see us coming they would immediately surround us with a barrage of complaints. One Iraqi policeman tells me “we have no heat in this building.” Another one shouts out to me “this place doesn’t have any running water. We need water.” There is an under current of emotion that is slowly rising up in me. I have been a soldier for 24 years and whenever I have gone a training exercise or mission I was never given the best of accommodations either. As a soldier part of my job is to adapt to any situation that my mission calls for me to be in. I have spent nights in the rain and freezing cold temperatures trying to get some sleep. I have eaten meals in extreme heat with all kinds of bugs buzzing around me! Instead I see a bunch of guys who are not focused about their purpose for this mission. Don’t get me wrong as a soldier we have complained about our situations too but when it came down to it we sucked it up and made the best of the situation. I learned also that we are under the jurisdiction of the Iraqi top command. They are the higher ups that decide how we move with the Iraqi National Police. I don’t feel comfortable with that decision but these Iraqi generals are so indecisive in their decision making that this is a prime example of what can happen when things are not properly planned. I have also learned that communication within the Iraqi Defense system is poor. I don’t understand the reasoning behind why they wouldn’t communicate to one another. I just don’t like my American leadership putting me and my team at risk of their bad decision making. So it was decided that the Iraqi National Police head back to Baghdad. We had a chance to do a short patrol within this city. The city I can tell you about now is called Diwaniyah. The city is more populated with people and for what it’s worth it is a lot cleaner than Baghdad. There aren’t that many abandoned buildings here so that added to the problem of trying to find lodging for our guys. I am so excited about returning back to camp. It was forecasted that we would stay for at least 3 weeks! I am so relieved to be leaving because we have to start preparing for our replacements. It’s a four hour ride in the turret but I think I can suck it up!

Nov 17 – We made it back around 9 p.m. last night. I am awaked by the sound of incoming rockets into our camp! “Oh come on insurgents” I think to myself. I hear one rocket and then another; and then another! When it’s all done I think I counted about 5 or 6 impacts to our camp. I wish that I could pin point where the guy was who was firing those things! I get up to go have a look outside like I expect to find a huge creator in front of my door step. Instead I find nothing but the civilian contractors sitting in the nearby bunkers. I can’t wait until I leave this place. I have 28 days and counting!

Nov 19 - Today I am back in the groove of closing out my expense accounts for our team. I have to do a few other things such as order new supplies and drop off old equipment for repair. The camp is filled with so many new faces. The new divisions of units are coming in to replace the old ones. I feel like an old timer. The familiar faces I once knew in the mess hall are slowly disappearing. The strain of our time here can be seen on our faces and are a contrast to the new personnel in our camp. It’s been a long year. I am mentally making plans for my return back to Charlotte. I have to find a job because when I left I was an IT consultant working for a local firm, so I don’t have to start over again. I will of course resume my teaching my fitness classes. This is the one activity that I enjoy that affords me the opportunity to motivate so many people. My students have given me the honor to speak into their lives. I don’t want to be known as a celebrity or some kind of guru. My message is simple; understand what God’s purpose for your life and then go pursue it with all of your heart, soul and mind. Lastly it ecstatically drives me to tears to be reunited with my wife and children. I have missed them so much. This Thanksgiving will be the first Thanksgiving that I will be away from them. My wife is such a great cook! What they will do is leave a place at the table for me. This is to remember me during the meal. The Army will do the same thing in our mess hall. The will set a table for the ‘Unknown Soldier’. There will also be a place setting for the soldiers that we have lost in battle. We do this also to never forget our brothers in arms.

Nov 22 – It’s Thanksgiving! We are given the day off. The mess has prepared a beautiful meal for us at the mess hall. When I walk into the dinning room there is an ice sculpture that is a poor attempt by someone to tried to shape it into a swan. I am not complaining; I really appreciate the effort. Against the wall is a table that has about seven gingerbread houses on it. Each house is decorated with an assortment of candies and trimming that were made out of strips of icing. I grab my tray and stand in the long serving line. I finally make my way up to the front to where there at five guys who are serving the side dishes such as mash potatoes, gravy, stuffing, carrots and yes my favorite sweet potatoes! I have my plate loaded with my side dishes and I make my way to the guy in the chef’s hat that is craving a turkey that has been smoked. I was certain that we were going to get the Army’s version of a turkey which is usually a processed turkey roll. The chef carved me two beautiful pieces of turkey and put them on my plate. I got my drinks and found my place at a table. I sat there and bowed my head for a moment of prayer. I thanked God for protecting me and my team while we are here in Iraq. I thanked God for my precious wife and kids. I thanked God for my parents, family and friends. I could feel tears begin to well up in my eyes. I really wanted to be home right now. I was home sick for the moment. It was then that a few members from my team sat down beside me and started talking. Their presence snapped me right out of it. These guys were my family right now. I can’t imagine just how much they were missing their families too. We all were in the same boat together. All we have is each other. I finished my prayer by thanking God for them. The turkey was off the chain!!

Nov 23 – “Attention, Attention – incoming, incoming!” is the voice that awakens me from my sleep. I look at my watch and it’s about 6:45 a.m. I have been here almost a year and I have not heard anything like that before. I quickly jump up and put on my sandals and go to have a look outside. I don’t see anyone running or taking cover. All I can see is the contract workers sitting in the bunkers that are located in between our trailers. I can still hear the voice alert over the public address system saying over and over again “Attention, Attention – incoming, incoming!” I notice my heart is racing. I don’t know what to expect as I am looking in the sky to see if I can see at least a barrage rockets coming in my direction. I don’t know if I should take off running to one of the nearest bunkers myself. It is a cold brisk morning and the sun is slowly coming up bringing with it more daylight. Then all of a sudden I hear the voice again, “All clear, All clear”. What are these people trying to do to me? When I first came here they would announce over the public address system that there would be a controlled ‘detonation’ in five minutes. When they would announce it you would know that in five minutes you would hear a loud blast. I can tell that this is a new unit here. If this was a test of the emergency alert system it would help to let us know so that we would run out of our rooms frantically taking cover! This doesn’t help especially when I have to be dressed in one hour to leave and go outside the camp into the heart of Baghdad.

Nov 24 – We have begun to start the beginnings of what I call ‘prep work’ to get ready to turnover everything to our replacements. We are expecting them to be here in 8 days! We have two large shipping connexes that we use as storage. I am responsible for both and I have my work cut out for me. The first connex is easy because that houses our sensitive items such as our radios, night vision equipment, and other communication equipment. My officer watches this area like a hawk because he tells me that this is where the most pain is. We keep a property book for the team and all the items that are on our property book must be accounted for or there will be problems down the road. My officer is an expert at these matters. I have been a drill sergeant for the last 8 years so I haven’t been able to work like this in my original field which is logistics. The second connex is a nightmare! In this area we keep our ammunition and miscellaneous items such as truck parts, and also confiscated weapons taken from the Iraqis. We are not going out as far as I know on any patrols so I have a few days to really sink my teeth into the project. We have been on some many patrols that my office is so caked with dust! The entire team room is dirty and dusty. We have plans to clean everything before these guys get here. I would consider it bad manners to turnover a workspace that is so filthy. Sue me, my wife has me trained!

Nov 29 – It has been put out that today that we will go and visit the new sector that our Iraqi National police will occupy. This is the section of Baghdad that has such a strong JAM (Jaysh Al Mahdi Militia) influence. This influence is so strong that the last Iraqi National Police battalion that was here was severely corrupted by them. I must not have explained what JAM is. JAM is the Jaysh Al Mahdi Militia. This is the group of radical militants that you hear about in the news that we are fighting against here in Iraq. These are ones that are responsible for launching IED (improvised explosion devices) attacks against American troops. I learned from one of our interpreters about the effect this group has on the people of Iraq. One guy told me that this JAM group is so integrated into society that they make it their responsibility to correct the people if they display disobedient acts against Islam. For example one Iraqi man told me that he was beaten by JAM members because he was found to have been drunk in public. Another man told me that he was stopped by a JAM member for walking down the street with a woman they believed that wasn’t his wife. If a woman is not your wife they will marry the both of you right on the spot! Casual relationships such as dating between men and women are not tolerated. To get around this, people will do temporary marriages. I was told that this was done because young men who wanted to have sex could do so under this rule. Also it would save the honor of the woman and not bring her or her family to public disgrace. She could remarry without the fear of dishonoring her next husband. When the relationship has run its course, then a quick divorce was done to dissolve the marriage. This sector is unique because it houses two small Sunni communities. Since the fall of Saddam the Shia are the dominant social group and their dislike of the Sunnis is no big secret around here. We met with the infantry colonel today for a briefing in which he said that the Sunnis are very much protected by American security forces. So much so that Shia sediments about the Sunni have infiltrated the ranks of the Iraqi police, National Police and yes the Iraqi Army itself.

Dec 1 – It’s December 1st! I never thought it would get here! I have about 21 days until I walk in the door of my Charlotte home to see my wife and children. My journey started September 22nd of 2006 in Fort Riley Kansas. I can’t believe that this experience is finally coming to an end. I’m sitting outside my trailer watching the sun set as the evening air grows cold and brisk. I will be soon walking the streets of Charlotte again going to my favorite Starbucks shop that is located in the Bank of America atrium at the corner of Trade and Tryon Street. I will have my usual which is a Venti bold coffee with a shot of hazelnut flavoring. I can’t help but feel a sense that a piece of me will end up staying here. This country has a long way to go before any major changes can take place. The special interests groups and of course the influence from Iran is just a few issues facing this poor nation. Now that I have been living here I can put faces to this place. I can set the sights and sounds of this place to my memories. I remember the first time driving down the streets of Baghdad and seeing a man riding in a cart in the mid afternoon traffic that was being pulled by a donkey. I can recall the first time that I tasted fresh bread from the marketplace. I remember the first time I did the traditional Iraqi greeting between men where they kiss each other on the cheek followed by the word “salaam”. I remember when the summer days were at least a 120 degrees and how at the end of the day my uniform was soaked thoroughly with my own sweat. For some strange reason I sense this feeling of not wanting to leave. I don’t know why but I know I have embraced an understanding of this place and its culture. In some ways Iraq has embraced me as well. There is so many things that I have learned about the Iraqi people. They have laughed at my sense of humor and have at times told me that I have some Iraqi blood in me because I am not afraid to partake in their customs or courtesies. I guess the real truth is that I have been put in a unique situation to come out of my American lifestyle and explorer something that is totally different then me. To my surprise I like it. This might be true but at the same time I have grown into a deeper appreciation of who I am as an American. I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world! I am so proud of my country’s accomplishments especially when the United States takes the blame for many of the world’s problems. I wish everyone could see how the United States is such a positive presence in the rest of the world! I can see it in the eyes of these people. They really want the benefits of what we enjoy as Americans. Their only problem is that they are not willing to make the same sacrifice what we did as a nation to get it.

Dec 3 – Our replacements are finally here. They are an eleven man team just like us made up of one half officers and the other sergeants. I can see the eagerness in their attitude to quickly get started with their mission. We will have to double up in our rooms with them until we do a final turnover of equipment and the mission. My replacement is a young staff sergeant that comes from Fort Bragg North Carolina. We quickly exchange pleasantries and we start comparing notes on the training that our two teams participated in preparation for this mission. I noticed immediately that most of the guys have a background with the infantry. Believe this or not but that will not have any advantage to them. Good people skills will be of the most value to them. The Iraqis will test first them by responding to them on the social level. These people require relationship before they even begin to open up to you. It is already difficult for our team to communicate to this next team what to look for when working the Iraqi National Police. There is so much to tell. Most of it will have to be experienced by them on their own. It is impossible to tell them just what to look for in every situation. This team looks pretty good. They seem to like each other. Today they came right into our team room and began to clean house. My counterpart moved into my office and began cleaning my office. I didn’t feel a sense of loss because for the last 4 months our chief kept us out at the station so much that I forgot what it was like to use it. It was a good feeling to be clearing out my desk. This new team is taking over now. I’m going home. That’s all that mattered to me.

Dec 6 – Today was last time outside the wire. We went to visit the new sector that our replacements will be working in. This is a new sector that is very dangerous. From what I have been told this area has a lot of JAM (Jaysh Al Mahdi Militia) influence in it. Today we will travel to the infantry unit that will be supporting our new team in this area. We hopped into our trucks as we have so many times before and headed out of the gate. To my surprise the commute to this camp is only 20 minutes away! We meet with the First Sergeant and company commander to get the briefing on this area. We also get a tour of the place by the First Sergeant. I have seen so many of these in sector camps and after awhile they begin to look the same to me. It is a compound that is surrounded by twelve foot high containment walls. There is also a main building where the commander works from and there is a building where the troops sleep. You can bet that there will be a place that they will have set up with weights for the soldiers to workout. This camp is smaller than the place that I stayed at when I was in downtown Baghdad. The good news is that this unit has a mobile kitchen on site. The First Sergeant said that they will be serving two hot meals a day shortly. This is good news for the soldiers who will lived out there full time. There is another section in which the Iraqi National Police live. They have been given a few buildings to house their personnel. The tour was finished and we completed our mandatory visit. We loaded back on the trucks and headed back to our home base. While riding down the road my thoughts bring me back to how all of this seemed so new to me when I first got here. I remember viewing the neighborhoods and streets of Baghdad from my position in the turret on the truck. I couldn’t believe that this would be my last time driving these streets of Baghdad. There will be no more scanning the roof tops for snipers or watching cars on the highway for suspicious behavior. This would be the last time that I will ever see these streets. I wish these people well. They have so much do if they want to become a self reliant nation. We make it back into the gate of our main camp in no time. I am so excited because I don’t have to wear this heavy body armor any more either. The stains of sweat and dirt on it tell the story of my year over here. My duty is done and now I am ready to come home!

Dec. 7 – For some strange reason, I remember that December 7th is the day that Pearl Harbor was attacked. I can remember the voice of the news journalist when he said “this is a day of infamy.” War is ugly no matter where it is. I went to our team room to get the rest of my stuff out of one of our trucks. The new team is moving into our area so fast it is obvious that my mission here is done. I go outside to the trucks and I see one of my captains from my team has gotten the same idea. I go over to him to ask him if he would let me video tape his comments about how he thinks the war is going in Iraq. I am surprised by his response to me. He declined my offer to video tape him but he did make this statement: “This is an easy war to fight. The problem is that today’s army is a different army. This is an army wants to be the good guy at all times and is not willing to be uncomfortable to do some hard things to win this war. It is obvious that the American people are not behind us in this war. Most of them don’t even why we are over here. Young people are growing up with not having a respect and sense of duty to serve their country. They view it more of as a choice than a birthright. It is sad that most of them are not even willing to wear the uniform. This war shouldn’t take this long to win.” I can’t help agree with his statement about “not wanting to wear the uniform.” The camp where I have lived for a whole year has civilian contractors living and working. Some of these contractors were former military personnel. They all hold positions that were held by soldiers in the old army. Jobs such as logistics, food service, communication and weapons repair. The crazy thing about this is there are contractors that are getting paid in some cases twice as much as an individual in uniform. I have heard discussions among other soldiers that when they return to the states they will get out of the military and try to return as a contractor. This saddens me but at the same time there is some logic to it as well. I have enjoyed the honor and privilege of serving as a U.S. soldier. It is something I will treasure for the rest of my life. On the other hand, with jobs being the way they are in the states, I could understand any one jumping at the opportunity to make $100K a year tax free. We finished the interview and I grabbed the rest of my gear out of what was now the other team’s truck. There are so many opinions to why we are here. I feel like I have heard them all. Which one is the right one? I don’t know but in either case I just want to go home to my little house in Charlotte, North Carolina. I want to see my wife’s smile and the sound of my children’s laughter. Politics is too difficult for me. Being here has made one thing true for me. People are people and the ones that I have met just want to take care of their families and live in peace just like I do.

Dec 9 – Last night we moved out of our rooms in to the transient tents on the other side of our camp. Our replacements have fully taken over everything. This tent is a full side tent that sleeps about 50 or more guys. We are located back behind the mess hall so the walk to go get chow is shorter than the one I had taken all year long. The rest room and showers here too are located in trailers directly behind us. I was shaving this morning when another soldier that I knew came in and placed his stuff near the basin where I was standing. “Jonesie!” I shouted as we shook hands and embraced each other right there in the latrine. “Big Lew (a name that I am called around here and so reluctantly answer to), how are you doing?” he asked as we stood back from one another as if we were inspecting one another for war wounds. Sgt. Jones was in my class that trained for this mission at Fort Riley, Kansas. We immediately began comparing notes on our team, the mission and the dangerous experiences that we had. Well I will tell you this. I thought that my situation was bad but after listening to my friend whose team has been blown up eighteen times it made me feel more and more grateful for what I had been through. Also they lost a man because half of his foot was blown off in one of the IED (improvised explosion device) attacks against them. The rest of the teams are slowly coming in from their respective camps to prepare to go home. This is an exciting time. Some of these guys such as Sgt. Jones I haven’t seen since we left Fort Riley together.

Dec. 10 – We had to move to another camp. This camp will house me and my team for the next 4 days while we await our flight to Kuwait. This tent is even smaller than the one we left only this time we are sleeping on military cots instead of beds. The morale of the guys will make up for the substandard living conditions. At this camp units are coming and going. You can tell the new units from the olds that are leaving. The soldiers from the new units seem to be on the edge and anxious while the soldiers that are leaving are exhibiting behavior that equals their enthusiasm about going home. The mission is over for me now. No more danger, no more rockets or bombs; this camp will help me decompressed in the next few days. I saw Green Beans coffee shop over by the PX (Post Exchange). I just put my bags in the tent. I think I will go over to Green Beans and have them make me a bold coffee with a shot of hazelnut!

Dec 12 – I fully understand the function of this camp now. As I get older I find myself having to go to the rest room at least once during the night. So as usual Mother Nature calls and I wake up to answer the call. Like I said before I am in an area where there is nothing but tents. As I begin my walk in the dark to the portable bathrooms I am startled by a large group of soldiers that are standing around outside. The pathway is partial dark but I can see so many soldiers standing around talking or smoking cigarettes. They all are dressed in their body armor, helmets and carrying their rifles. There is a lot of noise going on for it to be 2:30 a.m. in the morning. Then there is the high pitch beeping sound of a forklift’s backing up horn that can be heard as well. I am just about thirty feet from my destination where on my left I pass an assembly area where there are buses being boarded by soldiers dressed in their full combat attire. I eventually make it to the restroom and I quickly make my way back through the darkness to my tent. The loud and unique sound of an Air Force C-130 cargo plane can heard taking off down the runway in the distance. This is the same aircraft that I will take to Kuwait. You won’t believe this but as I am writing this, I can hear a pack of dogs barking in the distance! I understand about the soldiers, the forklift and the buses but this camp comes alive with activity! I just wish they would pick a better time than late at night to do all of this. They also could be a little quieter while they were doing it. I’m just a guy trying to get some sleep around here!

Dec 13 – So many soldiers from my class are showing up at the camp each day. When we were at Fort Riley, Kansas we were called Class 11. Class 11 is made up of about ten other teams that are just like mine. I will refresh your memory; we are called National Police Transition Teams. Our sole function is to train, mentor and advise the Iraqi National Police force in Iraq. When we graduated in December we all said our goodbyes to one another when we left Camp Taji, Iraq and went we to separate sectors throughout Iraq. As you know my team and I went to Baghdad. Well all of these guys are showing up team by team. They too have completed their mission and are headed home. We recognize each other faces and instantly we stop and greet each other with a firm hand shake and our American version of a man hug. It’s almost like we are at our twentieth high school class reunion. This is so different because the first question that we ask each other is a difficult one. “Did you loose anyone?” is the first question that is asked before we continue on in any further discussion. To be honest this question is a nail biter because without a doubt we all know that there were casualties during our time over here it’s just a matter of which team had the loss. It is equally as hard because we all knew each other when we were at Fort Riley. It is good to see everyone but I can see the hardship of war on their faces. One sergeant asked me “was your hair always gray like that or did you gray while you were over here?” I laughed at his comment because who knows what my body did to respond to the stress of going outside ‘the wire’ everyday.

Dec 14 – I don’t know why the Army always makes us travel at night. We are given the word to have our bags packed and outside ready for pickup at 2 a.m. in the morning. The news that we will soon be leaving Iraq surges the mood of the guys on my team. The time is slowly approaching where I will say good bye to the members of my team. Most of them I will probably never will see again. There were certain key people on this team that are responsible for destroying the morale and will of this team. We will have to travel back to Fort Riley as a team. Even though we are sharing a tent awaiting our flight to Kuwait, the mood is silent and cold. If anyone that has reason to hold hard feelings it is me. I can hold an offense against each member of my team; but to pursue it would be counter productive and a waste of time to me. I will say this; when working within the confines of a team it is the responsibility of every member of the team to contribute something to the success of the team. This team is made up of senior ranking personnel. Each member including myself has held a key leadership position some where. These transition teams have many flaws but one there is one that stands out to me the most. That is they have assembled a group of leaders who don’t work well together. These teams don’t understand ‘Synergy’. Synergy is the ability of a team to discover its strengths and weakness as a group and develop successful strategies to ensure the team’s overall effectiveness. What I am hearing from the other teams is there is instead division, disrespect and discord within the group. It is funny despite how I might feel about each member of my team I do believe each member has something to contribute to the group. It just saddens me that the working relationship between 11 guys who have been together for 15 months will come to an end on a bad note. Some of my teammates have already said that they can’t wait for all of us to depart company for good. Well I don’t share these same sediments of emotion. It just proves one thing to me that not everyone can be the boss and if every one was the boss you wouldn’t ever get anything done because everyone would be mad at each other.

Dec 15 – We landed yesterday morning in Kuwait at 8:05 a.m. It was official; I was out of the country of Iraq! No more rockets, IEDs (improvised explosion devices), or patrols! I was done! This has truly been the year of my life that has brought me all the way to the Middle East. I know that for some of the full time army guys they will probably see duty over here again in the near future. When I get back I will have to relinquish my drill sergeant hat because of my promotion to Master Sergeant. I have been assigned to a new company in which I will now work in my occupational skill set which is logistics. I am grateful that I had to the opportunity to serve as a soldier over here. I have no regrets just only memories. My prayers go out to the friends that I have left behind. I hope one day that whether here on earth on in heaven we both agree that someday will see each other again. We are being lodged at a base camp in Kuwait where there are Korean, British and Kuwaiti troops. Here we will sit for two days and prepare to go through customs for our flight back to Fort Riley, Kansas. As I’ve said before the atmosphere is like that of a high school class reunion. We are being reunited with each other. The conversation will always turn to comparing notes on the experiences each team went through during their mission. Today I spent the whole day today relaxing at the USO tent. I got up to get a cup of coffee and it was then that I ran into a captain that I knew from another team. We exchanged pleasantries and I asked the million dollar question, “did loose anyone?” The captain’s demeanor turned solemn as the expression on his face gave away his answer. “Yes, we lost two soldiers who died in IED attacks. There was a third soldier that was just injured but he survived.” I couldn’t but help express my sympathy for the loss of his team members. He went on to say that it was a difficult time for him and his team in dealing with such a loss. For those of us who didn’t experience something like that first hand it will still have some effect on us anyway. We trained with these guys at Fort Riley and even though they weren’t a part of team they are still part of our brotherhood. They will be missed.

Dec 17 – We are boarding our commercial flight today which will first land us at Ramstein Air Force base in Germany. Of course this is the same type of flying torture trap that took me home for R&R leave in September. The seats are very small and there is very little leg room. This time I had a different plan. I’m going to volunteered to be on the baggage detail team. This team of about 50 guys will help with the loading and unloading of all our baggage. My expectations are that if I volunteer for this duty I will be rewarded later with a comfortable seat on the plane. It was about 4:00 a.m. when we arrived at the U.S. Customs Clearing station. The baggage team would be the first off the buses to take up positions to unload all of this baggage. I never realized that my class (200 soldiers) could have so much baggage! The airline would allow each soldier to have to 4 duffle bags, a back pack and one carry on that could also be a laptop computer. The baggage team was shuttled to an area where a big tractor trailer truck was waiting to be unloaded. We formed a single filed line and began to unload the tractor trailer. Wow! I have such a respect for people that work at places like UPS or FEDEX. When we finally unloaded the last duffle bag the ground was covered with a sea of duffle bags, back packs and a few other odd looking bags. All these bags had one thing in common; they were heavy as hell! The weather in Kuwait is much warmer than it is in Iraq so the early morning air was warm enough for me and few of the guys to break out into a decent sweat. The next part of this process that I absolutely hated was that all of these bags out here would have to be inspected by U.S. Customs inspectors. That meant that a Customs agent would empty each bag and check for prohibited items. The only good thing about this is that I would have to personally bring my 4 duffle bags, back pack and laptop computer through to have it inspected. This part was painful because the agent would have storage bins nearby where he would empty the entire contents of each bag that I so neatly packed on a table and go through each item one by one. After he was satisfied that I didn’t have any illegal items such as ammunition, drugs, weapons or pornography he would then have me take the mess that he made to another table where I would have to repack my bag. I didn’t this routine for each of my bags! Once all of my bags were re-packed I went to the exit door where some of my baggage team buddies were assigned to check to make sure that each bag had been inspected. Once I cleared these guys we brought our bags outside to another group of guys who were standing near a truck that had a conveyor belt sticking out the back of it to load our bags back on to another truck. I was then ushered to a containment area where I couldn’t leave. This is where we all sat for the next two hours until our flight was ready to leave. Whew! This process started at 4:00 a.m. and we were done by 7:30 a.m. Am I tiring you out yet? I am not done yet. We were put back on buses to head out to the airport runway where the baggage team was called back into action again. Our job this time was to load the hull of the plane. They had a conveyor belt that extended from the hull of the plane. The truck that carried all of our bags pulled up along side of us and quickly we formed into three teams. One team would be up in the plane to receiving the bags from the guys below who would be putting the bags on the conveyor belt. The third team would be unloading the truck. I was on the team putting the bags on the conveyor belt. Again, I have such a respect for the men and women who do this kind of work. When we were done and the plane was loaded some bad happened. A bus pulled up with a company of soldiers from the country of Macedonia. I believe this is a country in Europe some where. The fact they we were landing in Germany first meant that there were some passengers that would be getting off when we landed in Germany for refueling. Also it meant that the front seats would be taken up by these Macedonia soldiers! I can tell you that the baggage team didn’t take the news too well. I didn’t either. We wouldn’t be rewarded for our hard earned work. We boarded the plane and we noticed that the rest of the members of our class had been already seated. So we had to find open seats that were sporadically located throughout the plane! At this point I was so tired. I felt like I did a full shift at UPS. The thought of finally going home would make up for the disappointment of not getting a good seat. Where’s is the flight attendant? I need that complimentary beverage ow!

Dec 18 – I have to give the flight team credit. When we landed in Germany we were asked to exit the plane so that they could refuel and clean the plane. When we got back on the baggage team was asked to move forward to take seats up front that were more comfortable. This was better than nothing because we still had 8 more hours until we would land in Bangor, Maine. We were back up in the air again this time with smiles on our faces and adequate leg room. The flight attendants had spaced everyone out evenly throughout the plane so to make sure no one was uncomfortable. It was after 6 hours that that the captain announced “we were back in American airspace, welcome home guys!” It was then a rouse of applause erupted from the plane. I too felt a wave of excitement rise up inside me. I couldn’t help but reflect back to my new found friends that I have left behind in Iraq. Would I ever see them again? I don’t know but one thing for sure is that it was time for me to come home. The time was slowly approaching for me to say goodbye to these guys that I have been with for 15 months. I know that there were some bruised and hurt feelings among the team members but I believe that this is normal. I believe that the more that you are involved in a relationship with someone whether it be business or pleasure there will always be the risk you will end up hurting someone or getting hurt yourself. What counts is if you possess the courage to say “I was wrong”.

Dec 19 – We arrived at Fort Riley, Kansas in due fashion. We were huddled into an assembly area and seated into some bleachers where there were civilian workers waiting on us. The supervisor of the group introduced himself and welcomed us back home. “Guys welcome back home. We are going to do something that we haven’t done before. We are going to work extra hard to get you guys out of here before the Christmas holiday. We are going to need your full cooperation to make this happen. We are handing out schedules of where you are to be each day. If you follow this schedule we will have no problem in making our deadline.” A loud cheer came from the bleachers. It was no doubt that the next two days would be insanely crazy. At this point I think we are up for the challenge.

Dec 22 – We made it! All equipment has been turned in and accounted for. All paperwork regarding personnel matters, pay, leave, and next duty assignments have been signed. We were on our way on home! We cleared our barracks and our baggage was loaded back on to buses headed for the Kansas City airport. It was about 4:00 a.m. when the buses came. All of the soldiers from my class were standing outside saying their last goodbyes to each other. What disturbed me the most was that there were certain teams where the members didn’t a say a word to each other when they got on the bus! I was able to find a few members of my team. The first person I found was the officer that I worked with from day one. “Sir, I just want to thank you for coaching, training and mentoring me.” His response to me was mutual but I could tell by his demeanor that he wanted this conversation to quickly end. I found a few more team members and expressed my thanks to them and promised to keep in touch when I got back home. Call me a fool if you like but I felt a sense of loss when I got on the bus. We were 11 guys that have been together for 15 months and no one was making an effort to end our time together on a good note. It’s sad that it had to come down to this. I arrived in Charlotte at 10:37 a.m. to the cheers of supporting family, friends and people who just wanted to welcome us back home. That night before I went to bed I sat down and wrote my team members this email, it read:

Hello Team Dirty,
This is me MSG Lewis. It's about 11 p.m. and of course I am fully awake while my family is still asleep in their beds. I know it will be just a matter of days when I will be back on schedule. The nature of this email is to do something that I felt was necessary. I have to confess that when we all were at Fort Riley I thought we would have one time to be together but the circumstances, be what they may, prevented us to do so.

All of you have known me to be the passive, quiet, and jovial one of the group. I never claimed to be the best soldier on the team but I was always open to learning anything. We have been together for 15 months! While at Fort Riley I noticed by the other teams that it was time for everyone to go home to their families. I observed also the bruised and irritated feelings everyone had towards each other.

You all know that I am a man of faith. Even though my beliefs are different than yours there is one thing that is always true for me. That is to say "thank you". I want to thank each and every one of you for being on the team with me. I thank you for being who you are and just doing your part to help when those days got hard for me. I won't bore you with the details but each and every one of you have played a significant role in my life. I also believe that living isn't about similarities but differences. I know that there are things that we don't like about each other and that we were never best buddies. In my eyes those differences made you all unique and at times fun to be with.

So in closing, I say again "thank you" and I pray for your continued success in whatever endeavor you choose to pursue for your life. I know we 'men' are not emotional creatures but I felt that I couldn't close this chapter on my life without saying "thank you".

Take care and God bless,

MSG Roy (Big Lew) Lewis

Dec 23 – I will be spending this Sunday at my parent’s house in Alabama. It will be the first time that my parents will have seen me since I left for Iraq. Well it is time to close this chapter on my life. I hope that I have given you all who have read my chronicles a snapshot view of what it is like to be a soldier serving in Iraq. I have attempted to present to you the insights behind the people, places and culture of the Iraqi people. I am equally grateful for this project because it kept me occupied with wanting to see it fully completed. This project has served its purpose is so many ways. Many of you have read my articles and have replied back with your comments. You have expressed that you have gained a new understanding on the ‘War of Terrorism’. The video footage of the Iraqi people has given you a new understanding on their culture as well. I want to say “thank you” to you all. Now that I am back on American soil reunited with my family and friends I know that I will be asked about my opinion about this war. There are so many ways to answer this question. I will say this that even though it is an election year despite what any political candidate might say American troops will still be here in Iraq at least for awhile. Secondly, Iraqi security forces are growing more and more dependent on American support and are (in my opinion) not showing any signs of independence at all. Thirdly, this is a country of alliances. There are so many different special interest groups operating within this country that the people are in some cases forced to choose sides. This is so evident in the makeup of the National Police units that I have had the privilege to work with. Some units are all Shia or all Sunni. The people here have come to accept corruption as a standard way of life. Equality and fairness is something that is foreign to them. Lastly I know they do not understand the freedoms that I enjoy as an American. The freedom that I enjoy has been brought with a price. It’s been paid for by the blood of people who believed in this freedom and were willing to die for it against any means necessary. The people of Iraq are not at that point yet. They are not like the early American settlers who were just farmers who decided to take on the mighty British Army to be free. Will they get that way? The potential is there. I can see an undercurrent of dissention among the people that is growing each day. These are people that want the freedom to raise their children in a country that is free and open. The only problem is that they just don’t know how to get there.